Sigh of relief

I had a chronic pain procedure scheduled for today. I did the left side of my lumbar spine 2 weeks ago and it’s best to do the other side 2-3 weeks later. Except, now the world is infested with plague.

This appointment had been causing my anxiety for over a week. Do I really want to go and put myself near extra germs? And then maybe bring those germs home? Can I really go there and not touch ANYTHING? And also…not breathe? Do I keep the appointment or don’t I? Do I or don’t I? Do I or don’t I? DO I OR DON’T I????

The anxiety really kicked into high gear last night as I read article after article about how the apocalypse is coming and the world will end. I really need to stay off the news and social media. But I didn’t. And so the fear and anxiety I felt before I went to bed was ramped up to 11. And then like an idiot, I read more when I woke up. Ugh.

After reading the panic inducing headlines, I get out of bed and my husband says to me, “How important is this appointment?” The second he said that, I blurted out, “I’ll just cancel it” with an unbridled amount of relief.

After calling and confirming the cancellation, more relief pours over my anxious body. And then I’m able to go on with the rest of my day, with less panic and no worry about what I might have brought home from that place.

And at 2:00pm, when I would have been getting needles stuck in me, I was out on a bike ride with my kids on a beautiful sunny day.

5 thoughts on “Sigh of relief

  1. It is so hard to know what to do. I am glad you felt right about your decision and enjoyed a bike ride in the sunshine. Things are so scary now.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I totally understand. I have had those shots myself, and you look forward to the relief they give you, but I don’t blame you for canceling. It gave you a different kind of relief.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. We have taken to watching an hour’s worth of news each evening, 6:00 – 7:00. We have found that watching more causes too much anxiety. I am sure that getting out bike riding with your kids was a great mental boost for you.


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